WELCOME BABY MAX!

Introducing
Max Charles Hunter
Born 12.10pm on the 11th August 2015
Weighing 8 pound 8 ounces (3.858kg)

I woke up at 12.06am on the 11th of August feeling like I needed to poop. It wasn't poop.

With contractions 3 minutes apart, it was GO TIME.

On the drive to the hospital, Drew made sure to check to see if I needed anything from McDonald's, making reference to a family joke about me needing a McHappy meal while in labour. I never realised how many bumps are on Wynnum Rd. It was fucking excrutiating.

This is exactly how it happened when Madi was born. It's crazy!

By the time I got to the hospital I was 4cm dilated & in a tremendous amount of pain, but the lucky thing about getting there so early this time around was that I had every option under the sun when it came pain relief.

I had Madi naturally, so I got to feel EVERYTHING.

This time, I started with gas.

I sucked that shit up like it was oxygen, but it didn't relieve any pain, it just made me high.

So I tried morphine.

I just got sleepy, but the contractions were absolutely killing me.

So I reluctantly chose an epidural...

I FUCKING LOVE EPIDURALS!

Luckily I opted for it, because I was in labour for the next 11 or so hours.

The pushing part? Well that took 3 contractions.

Max needed some help coming out, so the doctor threatened me with a C-section if I couldn't push him out in 3 contractions, and I took that as a challenge.

2 contractions later... Max was born.

I remember just bursting into tears once Max was placed on my chest.

He didn't want boob, he just wanted a mummy cuddle.

The most beautiful little boy that I've ever laid eyes on & he was mine.

Life became even more amazing from that moment on.

After a short cuddle, Max was taken off to have a canular put in his arm because I had developed a temperature nearing the end of labour. The poor bugger. I was glad that Drew was there with him because I would have cried like a little bitch watching my little man have a needle inserted into him 5 minutes after being born! (By the way, that's what the splint was for on his arm for those who asked in the photos!)

While Max was with Drew, I was being stitched up. It took about an hour so I'm assuming that I literally ripped myself a new bumhole while pushing Max out. I haven't been able to sit down properly since so I am pretty sure that I'm right when I say that. I also have to make sure that I don't fart when I sneeze because that could actually be disastrous.

The family piled in once the stitches were done & I was put into the shower where my brother-in-law got a glorious glimpse of me absolutely butt naked in the shower. For someone who has a weak stomach, he handled the view pretty well.

Life now?

I love being a mummy of two.

It is certainly going to be alot more challenging that I ever expected, but with enough coffee, Selling Houses Australia & cuddles from Drew, I should be ok.

Drew goes back to work tomorrow, so I am shitting bricks (very uncomfortably because of my stitches) that I will just cry when the reality hits. 

Madi is such an amazing big sister, but a very hands on one at that!

She loves patting Max & always offers him some of her food. It's gorgeous to watch.

I'm hoping that I'll be better at this mum thing than I give myself credit for.

I'm sure I'll blog about it either way.

I'm already getting a taste of what life is going to be like for now while I get used to having a newborn & a toddler.

This morning I ate Madi's crusts of her toast for brekky.

Then I had a shower at 11am.

I polished off a full bag of Matlesers in 5 minutes.

Then I ate lunch at 4.15pm.

I have washing everywhere, I don't think I have any clean clothes left because they're either covered in milk or baby vomit.

My bra size is currently a 12F although I could go to a 12G.

I am a list maker, a clean freak & generally keep myself well presented...

That shit has flown out the window for now.

Bring on the sporadic bathing routines, living in trackies & milk soaked bras, granny undies & shit all over the house for the next few weeks.

The fun has only just begun.

But who cares when your newborn is this friggin' gorgeous!

JPEG BW cropped.jpg
MotherhoodLauren Patterson